Red Planet Blues for d’Verse Mathematical Series Poem

I wrote this song about 10 years ago. Reprinted because the first stanza has a simple counting series…



One dusty red planet, two suns and three moons

Forlorn on my barstool in Rosie’s Saloon

When in walked five females with glowing green butts

Six eyes, seven breasts, and eight you-know-whats

Each… within reach


Now Rosie she said to me, “Don’t look so sad

Life on this ole planet ain’t really so bad

Just go ask them gals if they would care to dance

The ones with antennae and mylar stretch pants

On each… glowing breech”


So I went to the tall one with bulging blue eyes

And skin like the first rays of the double sunrise

I found us a table and bought her three gins

And felt all her feelers and her three double chins

Each… like a peach


Why’s a nice girl like you on a planet like this?

Now pucker up baby and give me a kiss

She locked on her mouth parts till I cried out in pain

My tongue had just suffered Andromeda strain

At the first smell of red blood the ladies converged

The sucked and they sucked till my sadness was purged

Each… like a leech


I woke up alone in a pink pleasure dome

On the dusty red planet I now call my home

Up above Rosie’s place by the shuttle pod bay

With the white suns arising to warm the new day

So it’s off to my job at the hydrogen mine

For the first time in 6 months I feel just fine

I turn to the day and the bright morning sky

Three moons, two white suns and one tear in my eye



About Ray Sharp

Father, poet, triathlete, local public health planner
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10 Responses to Red Planet Blues for d’Verse Mathematical Series Poem

  1. brian miller says:

    your tongue had andromeda strain…ha…oh my…
    nice embedded counting series…not quite the triangles we are working on

  2. Ray, this is really, really good. Way better than my triangle.

  3. Love the read.. a great of fun… and those end of the stanzas were just too funny. The limerick rythm of the stanzas made it a great fun read.

  4. shanyns says:

    Oh my! Laughs. Very well done.

  5. Tony Maude says:

    You had way too much fun with this, Ray – and so did I reading it … smiles

  6. MarinaSofia says:

    Brilliant, very funny! And so much easier than counting syllables. Just saying…

  7. hypercryptical says:

    Very good. Love it.
    Anna :o]

  8. grapeling says:

    Stellar. I had to say it… sorry 🙂

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